Practice Log for June 21

Areas of focus: root, sacral, heart, and throat | Duration: ~3 hours

Practice Log for June 21

Methods & Movements

I began my Kriya session around 10:30 am, after having had an atypical breakfast for me. Trauma processing often makes my digestion shut down, so I've been experimenting with a liquid diet to honor that rather than try to force through it. Good results thus far.

It was a little scary to take the hemp today know it would make me “feel more” of everything, including a lot of physical pain that was already present.

But I knew its source - on Friday my chiropractor (who practices "Applied Kinesiology") released an entrapped femoral nerve I'd had for decades through a series of unpleasant but effective steps. He then broke 3 adhesions along that nerve in my lower abdomen.

To say I was "sore" is putting it very mildly. But once I settled into my session, which I dedicated to “trauma release”, a series of 7 gentle, meditative flows moved up from my base toward my head and eventually out the top. Maps provided below. These cleared that pain, which was probably caused mostly by old fascia patterns suddenly missing a foundational “strut”. There was a lot of trauma shaking during this, and through most of the rest of the day too, but especially then. 

For this session I wrapped my feet in kinesiology tape. I have bunions on both big toes and have been working to correct those for a few years. I’ve made progress, but the toes have not yet fully straightened which makes balance in some poses difficult. The tape brought the toes more in alignment and helped to adjust the muscular alignment throughout the rest of the chain. I could really feel the effect all the way up. Small muscles in my angles, calves, knees, and thighs activated like never before. All good connectivity. 

I then moved through a series of deep flows, led by the coursing energy. Each flow culminated in a very (for me) advanced version of these 3 yoga poses which were held for a least a few minutes each while staying isometrically active:

  • Ardha Baddha Parivrtta Malasana (half bound revolved garland pose)
image sourced from https://ayurwiki.org/Ayurwiki/Ardha_Baddha_Parivrtta_Malasana
  • Prapadasana (one of the tiptoe poses) - this is one that I don't think I've ever encountered in classes, but it comes up constantly for in these Kriya sessions. The taped feet made a world of difference, supporting toe alignment and radically improving my balance. I was able to hold the pose for a while with arms fully extended above with palms together.
Prapadasana variation as shown in an Indus Valley Seal
  • Baddhakonasana Variant (seated forward fold with feet touching and knee apart) I folded forward and stretched my arms as far along the floor as possible, making this an active pose.

The rest of the session was less “resolved”, but still consistently focused on hips, legs, and feet. I moved almost constantly through many dancerly positions that felt like preparations for Adho-mukha-vrkshasana (Downward facing tree pose), Vyaghrasana (Tiger Pose), Supta-Kurmasana (Sleeping Tortoise Pose), among others.*

Insights & Breakthroughs

Through all of this I went through phases of hot and cold. This week it felt like blankets of fog lifting up out of my tissues, vs the coursing wind tunnels of last week; this was as larger area affects rather than pin prick precision.

As a result I was focused a bit more “zoomed out” or “bigger picture” than last week. I found myself thinking about that one-pointed awareness again, and began to postulate that the “opposite” of one-pointed awareness must be something like omniscience or awareness of the totality. The siddhi associated with that experience is I think Purna Brahma Jnana. I have sampled it a time or two in bliss states.

This growing, felt capacity for one-pointed and more generalized awareness within my body, and the ability to step into and out of one to the other, with various degrees along an every widening spectrum feels like a key to holding onto that awareness, or having access to it as a perspective I could take. Speculation…we shall see. There is probably literature out there on this if I’m onto something, though it might be quite old…

It occurs to me that this “omniscient” vs “pin point” perspective switch is both considered “divine power” and also characteristic of trauma responses. That is interesting...the key difference seems to be the role of choice vs externally originating force.

In trauma, its the later that forces you to take perspectives that are “not your own”… The divine version of it is a capacity of mind, body, and spirit in synch with each other. The trauma version causes depersonalization and/or dissociation, and the divine allows for both plurality and unity without reducing the divine into something “absolute” and separate from creation.

This insight into the differentiation between various points of view and ability to choose led me to a mediation on Differentiation & Discernment, and builds on last week’s use of pendulation. 

Last week it was about differentiation between energetic states in mirrored areas of the body. This week it was about finding more degrees of difference between pain and sensation. I commented last week on the “knife edge” I feel between pleasure and pain…which leaves little to no window for homeostasis. That’s not to say I’m always in pain or blissed out, but instead it means I’m usually very numb, with little “sensation”, aside from when the kriyas bring all sorts of sensations! So this was about picking that apart and finding that between the two sides of the coin is a spectrum of possibilities. I’m finding that as my discernment and differentiation skills improve, the more vast that spectrum becomes, and the more mobility or choice I have along it. I think I’m finally learning to understand and really feel the “window of tolerance”**.

I’m finding that this degree of choice and nervous system flexibility feels like freedom. This sent me down an interesting theological path, thinking through the ways in which freedom, choice-making, discernment, and sin have been conflated, and confused with the notion (role) of evil. 

And how appropriate that Ganesha, the god who switched heads (points of view), represents arts and sciences. Some resulting prompts:

  • How might we "differentiate" between "education" and "indoctrination" to preserve freedom? to encourage social harmony?
  • How does embodiment relate to "discernment"? How does discernment act as a rudder in a sea of possibilities?

Perhaps we should be teaching yoga in schools...

Mapping

I mapped only the energy flows of the first 7 movements. After that is when I taped up my feet and moved into the flows and postures outlined above which required my complete attention.

A chart showing the felt energy movements during this session.
  1. Flow 1 started at the site of pain and moved up that side of my body, directly through Svadhisthana, Anahata, and Vishuddha. It seemed to pass Manipura along the trajectory of a wide orbit. It culminated in a large blech. (Sexy, right?)
  2. The next pass started deep in Muladhara territory and seemed to skip up to the chest where it ran in several dense and difficult laps around my lungs…as though breathing against some external resistance, as though my rib cage was restricted.
  3. Some knots in my stomach were released and moved up into the vortex-like sensation of breathing against the invisible restraints. 
  4. I then did a bit of breath work, using various patterns and internal suction until a new “pain” “distracted” me from my groin, kicking off flow 5.
  5. This pain moved fast, following a similar path as flow 2 to skip from Muladhara land straight to Anahata. Several more laps seemed to build steam, gathering energy from all these sources until hit a bit of a “cap” of tension or knotting in my throat 
  6. Pass 6 started in a dense sensation near my right ovary, then shot up along both sides of my spine, through the tension of the top of my throat, and up to Anna. 
  7. The last moved more density from near my right kidney, into stomach, and then up…all seeming to collide in or around the lungs and released in one more glorious belch. 

In mapping out the felt states of the chakras I noticed no significant change between this week and last at the physical or spiritual levels. The mental however was shifted, probably related to the trauma processing through the week.

◐ = partial, ○ = open, ● = closed, ◒ = overactive

                                                                                                    

References: 

*I'm finding there's not much consensus about pose names online, so I'm including images of what I mean, when I can find them.

**“Window of Tolerance” is a term coined by Daniel J. Siegel and I think articulated in Siegel, Daniel J., and Mary Hartzell. Parenting from the inside out: How a Deeper Self-Understanding Can Help You Raise Children Who Thrive. 10th anniversay edition. New York: Jeremy P. Tarcher/Penguin, a member of Penguin Group (USA), 2014 . For an overview of the idea, see this Psychology Today write up - https://www.psychologytoday.com/us/blog/making-the-whole-beautiful/202205/what-is-the-window-of-tolerance-and-why-is-it-so-important

Mittra, Dharma. Asanas : 608 Yoga Postures. Novato, Calif.: New World Library : Distributed to the trade by Publishers Group West, 2003.

“Ardha Baddha Parivrtta Malasana - Ayurwiki.” Accessed June 22, 2025. https://ayurwiki.org/Ayurwiki/Ardha_Baddha_Parivrtta_Malasana.